For many years of my life, I have felt the pressure to live up to high expectations. It created a nonstop mindset of focusing on making wise decisions, having an appearance of a moral and ethical lifestyle, and essentially not getting exposed for doing anything dumb. Mostly, I was the one who placed these high demands on myself, I wanted to appear wise and have a good reputation.
That’s because for many years prior to having that mindset I was making countless poor decisions, and I was tired of suffering the consequences of them. I was utterly frustrated by missed opportunities, messed up relationships, and not having a good reputation. It forced me to mold myself into what I thought would be ideal. I didn’t have a role model to emulate.
I just tried my best to figure things out on my own, knowing only what “not” to do while attempting to learn what I “should” do. In many ways I was a trailblazer among my friends during that season, but I just missed so much! I was blind to so many things! I didn’t have role models to demonstrate important nuances or the knowledge of what I should be doing and when I should be doing it.
As a result, I experienced countless knowledge gaps throughout my life. It has affected my interpersonal skills, social skills, career aspirations, and hopes for the future. Although much of my life hasn’t been a complete disaster, I’ve been lucky enough to experience some very wonderful opportunities and fantastic moments. But they were often overshadowed by many challenges and longstanding disappointments that made my life feel hopeless.
An important journey
Many years have passed since the days of discouragement plagued my life. I’ve spent the past decade playing catch-up and attempting to learn some important truths that I’ve been lacking. I’ve felt very out of place and alone on this journey. But I have discovered there are countless men and women who have found themselves in a similar place in life and have made great strides to improve their circumstances.
Although, many others have been unable to find a role for themselves in society. They often slip away into depression and numb the pain they feel with overeating, drugs, alcohol, or some other strange behavior with negative consequences.
It is clear to me, that one of our deepest needs as humans is to feel loved and connected to one another but when we lack an understanding of this fundamental requirement and don’t learn the skills necessary to be a part of society we just fall apart. I’ve learned that some of the biggest issues in our lives are caused by a lack of knowledge.
The value of knowledge
There is a statement written in the Bible that reads: “My people are destroyed from a lack of knowledge”. For many years I understood this text to mean that the people of Israel and all people in general, are destroyed because they don’t know God or desire to understand Him.
But, when I consider this text, while recognizing the value of knowledge and wisdom, I don’t believe God is only referring to being spiritually destroyed, but physically destroyed as well. It is our poor choices that mess up relationships, damage our reputations, and ruin our finances. Sometimes we are just blind to the truth and don’t have the knowledge required to make important decisions. And as you’ve previously read some of my story, you know I can certainly attest to that!
When I consider all of the dumb things I’ve done throughout my life… The disappointments I’ve caused my family… The relationships I’ve ruined… How I’ve slandered people and became so cynical and arrogant. I was just filled with selfishness and lacked character; I was ultimately immature. Nevertheless, these things in my life happened because I was blinded by pride and lacked knowledge.
The ability to know the truth
Because of the challenges I’ve faced and the experiences I’ve had. I now understand how wonderful Jesus’ words are to God on our behalf. After being mocked, beaten, and abandoned, Jesus says to God, “Father forgive them, for they don’t know what they are doing”. If this example isn’t evidence enough for me to understand how badly I need to “know” (i.e., have knowledge), then I don’t believe I’ll ever grasp a better alternative.
Nevertheless, this is the reason why I believe knowledge is so important to humanity: in order to salvage what might be lost.
